No one can change the past; everyone can choose a new path today. Wherever you are in life, take the drive for perfection out of the equation . . . it’s an illusion.

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7 thoughts on “No one can change the past

  1. Your meme today was perfect – about taking the “drive” for perfection out of the equation. When I finally grasped that I COULD NOT do anything but believe and receive – everything changed. I’ve been a doer and driver all of my life. I received awards and accolades, but it nearly killed me. From a place of surrender, rest and trust, I have become a powerful tool in His Hands – accomplishing more for Him than I could have asked or imagined.

    • Mary,
      You have no idea how valuable your words are today! I’ve been terribly frustrated with stuff I’m trying to work out in my strength…which I didn’t realize until I read your comment. Unbelievably encouraging. Thanks so much! And, I’m thrilled to know God has abundantly blessed your letting go, only to send you soaring for His glory! That is fabulous! Have a wonderful New Year! Stay in touch! Colleen

    • Lynda,
      I totally get that!!!! I battle this often. It’s really hard as a high achiever and caregiver to know where to draw that line. Sometimes my body tells me and I get sick (like right now with the flu); other times my family lets me know I’m distracted…it’s so important to have others who understand help us with this. Most often, my soul feels dry or weary and I know I need to connect with Jesus…to sit with His word and remember His promises. He is always faithful and wants us to rest in that. It is a delicate balance…so understand!
      How are you? How was Christmas and Happy New Year!!!!

  2. It was so easy before children came along. I begged for children for years. The first one told me a lie, he turned out to be a super sweet easy child, honestly any one could parent him! The other two take me down mentally and I keep thinking I am a failure. Now… well, they are home due to Christmas vacation and my demons of what I expected vs what is are battling. I can hardly wait for next week to refill my empty tank!

    • Dear Fab…
      You are so NOT alone in this area of frustration. Dealing with our expectations vs what really is happens to be one of life’s most traveled roads as we mature. I’m so, so sorry for your disappointment and how hard things can be!!! I get it. What I have to do when I’m frustrated is this process…1) write down what I expected, 2) write down next to it what reality really is, 3) ask the Lord to help me accept what He has allowed because there is purpose in everything He allows, 4) ask the Lord for help in aligning my will with His, and then to direct my attitudes and actions as I move forward. Sometimes I find my frustrations are related to my own selfishness…I’m tired, wish things were easier, wanted to pursue something that I cannot pursue, being held back from what I planned. Other times, my anger or aggravation is because what He has allowed is harder and bigger than I can handle. It’s very human to be frustrated when we are given stuff that’s too big or hard; but we start where we are. It is incredibly freeing to simply admit our human emotions…we can only handle so much. And, our emotions aren’t good or bad, they just are. What we do with them is where we hit the areas of good/bad, right/wrong, so on. If you are comfortable talking more about what is bugging you, I would love to help you walk through the valley, maybe offer some perspective or things I’ve learned as I’ve raised a totally dependent child for 20 years now. He will never be independent; I will never have an empty nest (normal expectation), he will never drive, go by himself to see friends or even have many friends (normal expectations for parents). It took me a LONG time to embrace what God allowed; and I still get frustrated at times. However, what I never expected has also been the greatest gift to my soul. My faith and purpose in life would have never been where it is today without him. While I would never change these things, I fully understand how hard it can be and would love to help in any way. Please reach out anytime! Let me know if the exercise above is of any help as well. You are a treasure, thanks for your vulnerability and grit. Hang in there! Colleen