• Leesa

    Hello Colleen, acceptance is certainly key for me, as one of most uncomfortable feelings is unresolved anger and when resist cannot have this clarity and healing,and it only then feels more uncomfortable and more of that emotion we are resisting. THis morning I am so grateful, I feel the warmth of pray whether it is in deed from you or someone praying for me, as yesterday it began that I had greater clarity of how after art therapy I cried and cried, and I was resisting the emotion of old wound with bitterness and resentment of old family wounds in what was a triggering event for me. I found that I was not able to speak because of this resistance to express, not knowing how to express,and how about that, God placed me in this very program to have this outlet to express those emotions and old wounds that I and others cannot get to and express, and some even not knowing had. I am so grateful. It was truly valuable,as I can return next week and talk and share what my painting was ,we were to paint our hearts and I used acrylic as watercolor that was always my medium of preference and talent, and it was soft pastel of ocean green, soft pink and of light purple and that was washed with dappling water droplets on this purplish heart,and then dappled some water with yellow paint on it in corner and touching pink heart, the name was healing light, as I saw the one true love of Christ Jesus in the light of yellow and He is who loves me and softens me,and the water were my tears and once all came out after this class I understood what I needed to express. When I return next week I will share with my new art class mates. as each shared their paintings well and fully as we are presenting our works of art/expression. It funny as when I had concentration in art therapy in school, I always knew it was the third drawing that was true to our true feeling and mine was the purple washed out heart, the others were more formed and soft . I have a dream and prayer that before I die I hope for art therapy license, however will be will be, but on my very bucket list . I am still asking Lord about pastoral counseling to bring me to that teaching and perfecting me for this if this is His will beyond the certification class I have currently. I sense He just may be guiding me that direction. Lots of crafting of me, but art is my gift and that can acquire with any type counseling degree. If His will He will bring me that way. as of now I would not be able to afford although if His will like all other classes and certification and programs He has been placing me without any cost to me, all being provided. I am so grateful!
    I did speak for over an hour on telephone with middle sister that nite after art therapy class,as I was cryign and we connected,and all is well with both of us, she does think of me all the time also and gave me ex of her and her husband at a street art festival near her town and pointing out jewelry handmade that she said to her husband I would so like. We had a real good heart to heart talk, I told her about the art therapy program and all. I will continue pray for her as she will have updated blood tests this week, I praying for a miracle for her kidneys to be back to normal. She is a tender good hearted spirit even more tender than I am. I love her so very much.
    If the prayers were from you this morning I have been receiving warmth of , I am so very grateful as I feel our precious and loving Jesus Christ give me the recharge by resting comfortably and what literally is sense of HIm recharging my energy byHis hand providing this restorative resting. He is providing for me as a whole sense here. It has simply been peaceful and of the warmth of that blanket of love and light we speak of around me and my shoulders to comfort and love me so greatly, and to have my attitude back, my clarity of what transpired and how I praying for Jesus to perfect me in the ways of His will and His crafting He is already doing and to bring me even closer to HIs imitation of how to love others without any expectations , or resentments, or anything but wisdom in situations that I will have the fullest of clarity. I will say as of now I hear to stay put and if that is true I will see by His will as we approach months forward,although I do see He wants me to remain here at home and with Church family for Christmas for the purpose of a recharge and restore and strengthen me with His love and those I do feel great love around me here at CHruch. That is what I sense is His speaking to me to do, a lot has transpired this year and I have traveled quite a bit, I have gone where there has been discomfort and great miracles of forgiveness came , as I know more will come, this is what I am hearing in the now to do. I also have a sense something of God wrath going to happen out in world and travel would potentially place me in the middle of it all? just my intuition I seem to be having or something northern states that may or may not be true, I need to stay put, and see where He leading me. If something changes it will be clear as I have prayed to know and hear without a doubt in mind the clarity that it is His guidance and direction. That keeps me where I know to be without confusion. I will be praying for my mom biopsy this end of month to be non invasive, it where and of same lump in past was breast ca metasticized on head, this would be the only concern and reason I would hear a different plan of action no matter what discomfort or challenges in travel, I will continue pray that she all clear and well in this for her and if God will stay longer , I pray also for her salvation . we remain connected almost daily by facetime. I am not able to share all with her so a discomfort at times yet I know there is a spiritual part of her we share love , another area I asking Jesus to perfect me to not react emotionally to some things that to teach me to imitate him better and more , as I am in all classes to help in this area to simply allow her be her and me me and what we can share and what I can be to show His love and qualities of character regardless where we do not align on topics or attitudes of any given subject or discomfort/challenge , that is my prayer and practicing.
    I will be continuing read from Genesis through old testament, Sunday school covering also Exodus and Leviticus, and BIble Study we just covered Old Testament and how connects to New and what is different, and what is repeated and then Apologetics reading book and going over. I also have the holistic certification need connect back to and continue working on.
    Have a wonderful weekend COlleen, hoping with the storms , all will be kept safe and recovery for those still in need come .
    Thank you
    Leesa

  • Leesa

    Colleen,
    I realize so much more each moment as I walk through living with Christ, that I am most grateful ,at this moment in regard to reading the BIble ,and learning the stories,characrers, culture, history, and how so much is repeated to have the greatest of Faith and Trust in God. It is so magnificient for me . To see where God leading me, from last post where I see He has me sitting still now, I have in thought Jeremiah,and stories of Exodus as I learn His word and experiences where those were used to go into stormy areas for divine purpose of God. What I hear in now I stay put, it will be His call, maybe restoring me for what I sense in intuition is stormy , ultimately l follow His lead. I wanted to share as after I wrote update to you, I wanted to share this from in heart and soul of understanding which is a delight to me to have this insight like never before, as I truly take action in reading His word most thoroughly I know His almighty power to be of greatest of works always and wherever He is to place me, to trust He has this
    Take care this weekend,
    Leesa

    • Leesa,
      You sound good…waiting on God’s direction and continuing to fill your mind with His word.
      One thing you said about prayer and anticipating “stormy” circumstances. I’ve had/and continue to have to work at reframing my mindset when it comes to the unknown. None of us knows what’s ahead…but we know that God knows exactly what is ahead. When life is unpredictable-as it is for most of us-and when our past has many hurts God is healing in us, it’s easy to anticipate more pain or worry if what’s ahead will tumble us over. When that worry begins to surface, I say to myself… “Today is all I am given, tomorrow belongs to the Lord who promises to be good, faithful, and abundant in every way….His love for me never fails, while I may hurt through what He allows, I also know He will bring healing and transformation to my life”. Reminding ourselves that God is always good even when our circumstances are not pleasant helps cultivate deeper faith. Sometimes I have to remind myself out loud or by writing it out. Whatever comes, we know He is with you, for you, healing you and loving you without condition. What a great God we have! Thanks for the quick update and I pray your day is filled with peace and blessing. Colleen